Heather Evans Editorial

It’s been a week since we celebrated Easter in quarantine, which felt strange to say the least. This came as a surprise to me, if I am being perfectly honest. Not that we celebrated it indoors (I mean, that was an absolute given), but I was surprised by feeling nostalgic about it.

I don’t come from a particularly religious household and Easter has never held that sensibility to us. It has always been the holiday where I felt that I could stay at university if a deadline demanded it, or spend it with another’s family without feeling too much guilt. It’s just missing a roast dinner, right? Yet, this year I really craved my Grandma’s bean supreme – a family specialty – and the warmth of both hugs and food in equal measure. For the one holiday of the year where I normally feel complete indifference, I realised that it was the first Easter in my existence that the door was closed for us all. Even if roast dinners feel routine, it made me realise that the festivities and tradition of getting together and connecting can never be overlooked or devalued.

Yet, I couldn’t express or understand why I felt so sentimental. Although I missed my family, I felt there was still something I wasn’t addressing. Then, I realised: this was the first year that I hadn’t committed to Lent.

This might not seem like a huge deal, and it really shouldn’t. Depending on your background, I think Lent obviously can symbolise something meaningful or, like my family and friends, be treated as a bit of fun in the run up before Easter. And, of course, I am sure that the effects of COVID-19 has meant that some people’s attempt at Lent went through the window. I mean, I certainly wouldn’t have survived thus far without the emotional support of snacks, and food shortages has meant that food shops have had to become adaptable. However, as I got older the arrival of the beginning of Lent wasn’t the start of a collective challenge. It became a secretive, 40-day sentence that allowed me to be restrictive in what I was eating.

For people that know me closely, I have struggled in the past with eating disorders and restricting my food intake. And when I trace it back to its origins, Lent definitely springs to mind. Rather than choosing something tradition to forego for the period, such as chocolate, sweets, fizzy drinks etc., I would give up something that contributed to a large portion of my calories to the dismay of my mother and her lovingly curated lunchboxes. It became a theme that I would give up bread or pasta, painting it as wanting to really ‘challenge’ myself. I’m not sure if I was truly conscious of my reasonings at the time, but when I look back it makes me sad that during my late teens I felt this was a prime opportunity to see how my body could handle a sever lack of carbs for just over a month.

Easter, much like other festive periods, can be really tricky for those who have struggled with their relationships to food and their bodies. The movement from restriction to liberation used to make me feel incredibly worried, and I think this time of year brings back a lot of those memories. It makes me wish I could talk to my past self to let her know that she always deserved second helpings and, most importantly, love and respect from those around her and from herself. In that way, I guess this week has made me wish I could turn back time and do things differently.

As my relationship with my body and food improved, the one thing which really helped me become happy and healthy was my journey towards veganism. A common myth is that people think being vegan is restrictive, but it has truly liberated me in being comfortable with cooking and experimenting with new, amazing recipes and ingredients that I wouldn’t have dared attempting to create or use, let alone eat.

I used to be incredibly anxious when it came to cooking, even when it used to be just for myself. Cooking for others was completely out of the question (unless it involved putting a pizza in the oven…), and my fear surrounding food meant I made dishes which were simple, plain, and safe in my mind. I didn’t care for flavour, and if it was edible then it was good enough for me. However, even I eventually got bored of this controlled lifestyle. Watching others, such as my friends, flatmates, and the likes of food Instagrammers, having so much fun with expanding their culinary expertise made me realised that I deserved more than treating food as simply fuel. Rather than seeing food as a necessity for living, I decided I wanted an invitation to the wonderful world of cooking, and even send out my own invites for dinner parties at mine. I didn’t want to be on the outskirts anymore.

It has been long process and I am still learning everyday. The way my mind works meant that the only way I could permit the widening of my recipe repertoire was by researching – not just in terms of the food and dishes I wanted to create, but also the different equipment, techniques, and terminology used to assemble these colourful, exciting culinary creations. I used to get overwhelmed and frustrated with all the knowledge I didn’t know and question why it was so seemingly natural to others. This is when my sister pointed out that even the goddess that is Nigella had to start somewhere. Even Nigella had to practice. It didn’t happen overnight.

And I read books and blogs. Lots of them. Over and over again. And I took it a food shop at a time. Slowly, I grew to understand what made me feel comfortable and what I enjoyed eating. I became vegetarian at university before my foody research lead me to becoming vegan in 2019, and there have never been more doors open to me. I have tried foods I didn’t know existed, baked cakes which have never tasted better, and it has allowed me to be versatile and free when cooking. My pantry as well as my confidence have grown together like an old married couple, which has been down to educating myself, practice, and being curious in the kitchen.

A few people have asked me over the past year where I get my vegan recipes from and what books and blogs I have found most helpful as a newbie. As I have attested to researching the house down, I’ve included a few below which I would highly recommend if you’re curious about veganism or want some new, vibrant ideas to share with your family and pals 🙂

The Green Roasting Tin – Rukmini Iyer

This was the first vegan cookbook I bought and is definitely worth it. I refer to it at least once a week, and the recipes are incredibly accessible in both the ingredients and what tools you need to make each dish. Each recipe tends to have at least one ingredient you haven’t got in your cupboard, which is great for slowly growing your pantry, and the dishes all being made in one pot is super for those who have less time to spare labouring over their weekly meals as you can bulk-make (and there is less washing-up!). The book is split in two, one half being vegan dishes and the other dedicated for vegetarians, so I think it is a good investment for those wanting to expand and experiment. It is colourful, has really easy, clear instructions, and I can vouch the meals all taste great. All you need is a roasting dish and away you go!

I Can Cook Vegan & the Post Punk Kitchen – Isa Chandra Moskowitz

I Can Cook Vegan is easily my favourite cookbook ever. It is amazingly comprehensive for anyone wanting to learn the basics, and it has sections on every corner of cooking you could possibly need, such as soups, sides, main meals, sweets, sandwiches, salads, and pasta and noodles. The pictures and text are bright, big, and bold, and it has dishes with a range of difficulty and complexity if you are looking to challenge yourself and impress your friends. Everything is fab in this book, but it has the best baking section I have seen (the walnut brownies are to. die. for.), so if you are looking for ideas for sweets then this is your jam. I passed it to my boyfriend before lockdown so he could have a browse, and trust me when I say that distance only makes the heart grow fonder.

However, although I say I miss this cookbook dearly, Isa also runs a website called Post Punk Kitchen which she updates on the reg., and it is just as great. I couldn’t recommend either the book or her blog enough for those whom have a bit more time of their hands.

Thug Kitchen – Michelle Davis and Matthew Holloway

This is the cookbook and blog that I have had the most fun with. Most people think that as a vegan all you eat is rabbit food, and Thug Kitchen shows how we can also get down, fried, and dirty. Both the blog and cookbooks are unapologetic in their foul language and simplicity, giving you a bit of support in telling you that cooking vegan really doesn’t have to be that complicated to taste good. Their books are great, but especially during lockdown it is good to know that their website is booming and constantly being updated with recipes which you can explore for free. It is the furthest thing from boring, and I think their dishes are great to share with friends who may be suspicious of a newly vegan diet.

The Minimalist Baker – Dana Shultz

When you’re on the move, or you have a specific dish you would like to make vegan in mind, sometimes you can’t whip out cookbook after cookbook to find a recipe. Whenever I have searched the web for a vegan recipe, The Minimalist Baker has always reliably come up and delivered. Not limited to baking needs, it is the one blog where I will commit to a previously unknown recipe because it has always turned out great. It is a super user-friendly page, and it caters for all dietary needs and has nearly 1000 recipes for vegans. Most recently, I made my first ever gravy for Easter lunch and The Minimalist Baker didn’t disappoint. She has a cookbook out, and it is definitely on my list to add to my collection!

Finally… BBC Good Food

I just wanted to end on a note that you don’t need a fancy cookbook to begin or continue a vegan lifestyle. BBC Good Food has some fantastic vegan recipes which have become some of my staples, and if you’re looking to begin somewhere it is as good as any other place. After time, if you find the recipes a bit too basic you can always go off the railway tracks as you grow with confidence and make dishes you’re own!

Although I have said that I wish I could go back and do things differently, I’m glad that this year I did it without even realising. Breezing past my first Lent-less year is genuinely a big milestone for me, and it really has shown me how much I have grown and achieved in unbounding myself from old, unhealthy habits. And, I’m proud to say that I have accomplished my biggest achievement yet: I have invited people round and hosted my own dinner parties! Cooking for others has become a joy of mine, and I would like to end this post with sharing what my housemates and I made for Easter lunch. Courtesy of BBC Good Food and The Minimalist Baker, I made mushroom and ale pie with red wine gravy. It was the first pie I had ever made, and despite being away from our loved ones I think it made the day feel special.

Happy reading and cooking!,

Hev xo