Heather Evans Editorial

I think I need to begin with an apology. But, I promise I can explain.

I’m sorry that I have been so so so silent over the past couple of months, of which lots has happened and is worth blogging and talking about. However, because lots has happened, this is quite literally one of the first moments that I have had where I have managed to sit down with the right mental capacity to write. Although I do recognise a running theme flowing in the introductions to several of my posts, where I explain away my absences, I feel this one is slightly different.

Saying that the beginning of this year was a tough one for me is an utter and complete understatement. I had moved back home after sticking it out at a job that simply didn’t work out for me, I had lost some contact with some friends and, frankly, several other things that I had confidence in came crashing down around me. Hard. Yet, through no fault of my own. I had been trying to convince myself that lots of aspects of my existence were grand, when the truth was I was desperately trying to hold onto the foundations of several things which needed to be let go of for the benefit of my happiness and health. It was the most grueling lesson I’ve ever learnt.

Moving back home was critical for me, even if it felt like a step, or 5 million steps, backwards. I needed to clear my head, find out what was important to me and what I wanted to achieve. Trust me, there is no better way to get some clarity away from the world that living in a house with no Wi-Fi.

After having some deep breaths and time to ponder, I always came to the same conclusion: I want to work with books. In fact, I just needed to. Whether I talk about books, I light up and get passionate about their historical and cultural relevance, and the differing opinions people have about a single text. About protagonists and the world they live in, and the editorial decisions made by authors and their publishers alike. I knew I wouldn’t be happy doing anything else, despite the cripplingly and soul destroying rejections I received weekly from job applications, ranging from bookshops to publishing houses. However, with the support of my Mum, even when I felt like a failure and kicking all my toys out the pram, I just knew giving up wasn’t an option. I wasn’t going to compromise on what I wanted to do.

This is when I got my interview for my now current job.

The scene was a sad and pretty pathetic one. It was around 5:30pm, I was already in bed with a tub of salted caramel ice-cream, and I was drinking a luke warm bottle of £4 white wine of some description from Iceland (no glass obviously). I was staying at my sister’s boyfriend flat in London as I completing a week internship with Arcadia Books, but I was miserable and sulking as 3 days earlier I had been rejected from a dream role at Penguin Random House. I had forgotten I had even applied for the role at Taylor and Francis when I received the email, and I immediately decided to check myself and get out of bed.

The rest of it was a bit of a whirlwind. One week I was a statistic, a graduate without a job after 6 months of graduating, and then the next I received the phone call from my Editor congratulating me on the role, asking me when I wanted to start. It was an absolute dream. Publishing is one of the most competitive industries to get into, but with some perseverance and some failed interviews I cracked the code.

Alas, this was in April and now it is August. So, why the silence?

1. As soon as I got the job offer, I went to Amsterdam with my twin and our best mate. I know I wrote a little blog post on this, but I have been a busy lass.
2. Starting a new job fries your brain. Honestly, I had the intention of writing a blog post along this vain mooooonths ago, but I would come home and go into toddler mode. I want food. I want sleep. I couldn’t operate like the adult I (supposedly) am.
3.  My commute was not the smoothest. Initially, I was commuting to my workplace from Melksham to Didcot. If all went well, I could get home for 18:30. However, I had to wake up at 5:50 to get into work for 9:00, of which trains would often be cancelled or delayed, which meant being stranded for an hour or so. One time, I didn’t get home until 21:30. I was absolutely cream crackered.
4. I went to my cousin’s Bar Mitzvah in Israel. It was the first family holiday that we’ve been on since 2014, and it was really important for us all, especially my mum. Running a pub isn’t easy, and it isn’t a job where you can log onto an online system and request a two week holiday. It was great to see our cousins, uncles and aunties that we haven’t seen in years, as well as hitting the beach and travelling around to see some wonders of the world. The Dead Sea was a particular highlight.
5. Like I said, my house didn’t have Wi-Fi. If I wanted to write a post, I would have to go to my mum’s pub and sit upstairs. It is quite a distracting environment, especially when you like G & T’s as much as I do.
6. I’ve moved to Oxford. This has been a fact as of Monday that I now live in this wonderful city! I am super stoked because it means I can get 8+ worth of sleep every night and work is a bus away, but also it means I get to socialise with my work pals. They are pretty great and they are so much more than just ‘colleagues’; they are true friends.

Anyhow, keeping with the whole spirit of my blog, I am also going to update you on some of the books I have read over the past couple of months – some of which have been better than others.

The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood 

After reading Alias Grace by Atwood, when I saw The Blind Assassin on the charity shop shelf, I had to pick it up. With The Handmaid’s Tale being adapted for HBO, I feel readers have been awoken to her brilliance, and consequently the covers of the new editions of her work have been revitalised with stunning results. This is one of Atwood’s longer novels, but every page entices your curiosity and the mystery within the depth of the plot make it impossible to put it down. I did find it a little hard to get sucked into the story to begin with, but as the story picks up and the secrets within the lives of Iris and Laura become more dark and tragic, I didn’t regret pushing through the first 100 pages. If you want something that is allusive, heartbreaking yet romantic, this book certainly hits you in the feels. 8/10

The Room by Hubert Selby Jr.  

Siiigh. I really want to enjoy this book, but I have tried to pick it up about twice now and every time it is a battle I lose. I think it is to do with the writing style, but additionally the protagonist is unlikable, even in a villainous, rooting for the bad guy, kind of way. I may try picking it up again, but I think this book is all about perseverance and patience. 5/10 

A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini

I would happily say this is one of my favourite books of all time. This story of Mariam and Layla is gorgeous and tragic, and makes you realise the power of love despite incredible odds. You think that their situations in life will get better, but Hosseini dashes you idealised expectations at every turn of the page. He gives no illusions of the brutality of the time and place they live in and no rose-tinted glasses are ever to be worn. This book is an absolute roller coaster than had me in shock, tears and warmth. It should be read by everyone and repeatedly throughout your life. 10/10

Ready Player One by Ernest Cline

This is the ongoing task in my daily existence at the moment. I really expected more when I picked Cline’s book up, especially as it has been made into a film and my Uncle recommended it to me – normally his word is pretty much gospel. However, I pick it up and my primary emotion is irritated. The protagonist, Wade, I find is an unlikable, attention-seeking outcast that you feel no sympathy for, and I feel this is essential when the whole plot focuses on his quest to win Halliday’s prize and lend him his escape from his sad home life. His decision-making process is ludicrous and makes no logical sense throughout the book, and the writing style, albeit I appreciate is meant to represent a young American teenager living in the apocalyptic future, is stereotypical and therefore unbelievable and mocking. It really cannot be taken seriously. The 80s references that shape the game are plopped down in the book without real thought, making it feel cramped and overwhelming rather than enjoyable and unique. As you can tell, I am struggling with it, but I shall wade through (pardon the pun). 6/10

Anyway, I shall call it a day there. Hopefully, from now on I shall be a bit more communicative on my blog, and I already have the next one lined up after this evening. Just know that I’m living my best life xoxo

Happy reading!

Hev x