Heather Evans Editorial

The ‘D’ that you see in this post’s title does not stand for the ‘D’  that our generation tends to use for a certain part of the male anatomy. Oh no, not even close. If anything, this semester has been full of far to much ‘D’ for me to handle – and just to be clear, I’m unfortunately talking about my dissertation.

As I’m sat in a cafe trying to gain some inspiration for an impending assignment that is due THE SAME DAY as my dissertation (I mean, who does that?!), I’ve gotten to the dark mentality of thinking: is this ever going to be over? is this stress really worth it? can I ever pick up a book again and actually enjoy it? My heart and soul feels like it is being sucked out by the Dissertation Dementor, and no matter how much work I do or how much I try and bring some spice and light into my life, the little Dissertation Devil is sat on my shoulder looming over me like a dark cloud. My body is screaming at me for fuelling it with so much caffeine to power through book after heavy book, and I think the topic of my dissertation being mental illness is becoming very apt. It is slowly making me mad.

I’ve become to realise that all I ever speak about is my project, even in social settings, but not for the right reasons. I should be talking about it with pride and interest, but now it is a crippling obsession which means I don’t sleep at night. But then again, that could be the coffee..

I think for my benefit and sanity, I need to discuss why I love books and researching them, because sometimes by looking backwards it can help you move forwards. I hope this also brings some stuff into perspective for some of my other Literature pals and gals, or anyone stressing over their final year work.

1. As much as it doesn’t feel like it right now, books can make you escape the real world. Getting stuck into a good book can make you forget your current worries, take you to a warmer climate or magical location, and make you realise how truly lucky you are in the place you are at. Books, or any form of literature, can transport you and take you on an adventure, which is magical in itself. There is something really special about that.
2. They can make your imagination go wild. With the mundane normality of real life, reading can make you see things in different ways. In the prose world, of course dragons exist. Why can’t there be aliens? The future can be spelt out for you so many ways, and really everyone can have their own opinion. There is never a right answer or perfect interpretation – who knows what the author or poet truly meant?
3. It is a gateway to the past. We can access the minds and worlds of people from a different time. How cool is that? It’s basically time travel.
4. Words can make you feel emotions that aren’t even your own.  Although at the moment my emotions range from hysterical crying, to miserably stressed, to angry with anyone who walks in my path, to being  simply numb inside, by reading the tales of others it can make us feel sympathy for them. For once, we aren’t so wrapped up in ourselves and we experience the lives of others through their protagonist’s eyes. When reading, you can go from hysterically crying to hysterically laughing.
5. It’s a break away from the technologies of today. There is something organic and nostalgic for me about reading. Back in the ole’ days when social media was not the only words kids read of leisure, it meant I could get away from school and chill out with a book. The world is shut out, and it’s just me and the words on the page. It’s a form of entertainment that is just not comparable.
6. Although they aren’t strictly academic lectures, books sometimes can teach you things that no other person can.  Like I have discussed in my previous posts, the messages of some stories really hit home. They can relate to this world like nothing else can, and as much as your mum might tell you to be kind, love others, and that you don’t need to change, sometimes it doesn’t really resonate until it’s put in  a different context. Books can do that for you.

Even writing that down has made me feel better. However, I also need to think of ways of winding down and being more healthy in my drinking habits. Getting home after a date with the library, I need to shut off that part of my brain. As much as coffee is great, you can’t be on the ball all the time, and you sometimes needs to just chill the hell out. Otherwise, you really can’t be doing your best work, surely?

Here are some ideas and alternative drinks which I think are really useful to remember when doing work. Sometimes, you need to put you first, not your impending deadlines. Let your hair down and look after yourself guys.

1. Get into a TV series with your house. The way my house and I wind down in the evenings when we realise we just aren’t as wild as we used to be is by watching crap reality TV. Yes, I know. My IQ points go down with every second of mindless cheating and logic of some of these individuals. But, do you know what? It makes us laugh, and we forget about our current troubles by looking at others. Mean, but true.
2. You need to leave the house. Don’t be a hermit. As much as it might seem like a chore to get out of your PJs, and as much as you feel like you don’t deserve it, you do. Go to the pub quiz, go for a walk, go round another person’s house for tea. Don’t shut yourself out to the things you need and enjoy.
3. Coffee is not always your comfort. To get you going in the morning or to pick you up from your afternoon slump, sure. However, exceeding maybe 3 a day is a bit much when you are stressed. Maybe try something with less caffeine, i.e. have yourself a cuppa, but, even better, why not try some herbal tea or decaf if you genuinely want coffee for the taste? I have some Apple and Elderflower loose leaf from Whittards which is sweet and refreshing, forever calming me down. Or I tried some Cranberry Green Tea by Twinnings, which was just the one. You will feel better in yourself, which will impact your mood and stress levels too.
4. You need to look after yourself, but don’t deny yourself luxuries. If you want that cake? Eat it. You need to make sure you are not damaging your well-being mentally or physically, so balance is key. My mugs even tell me that if I need a biscuit it’s medically good for me..

I know this is all easier said that done. Trust me, I don’t even follow my own advice. Nevertheless, as my final note, I want to reiterate that things look bleak at the moment, but it will not last forever. This is only a moment in your life, and whether you get a first or not in your degree classification or dissertation, it will not define or devalue you as a person. Frankly, I can’t wait to just be able to read a book and appreciate it for what it is, without having to dissect it to its bare bones. We are all going to be fine. The sun will go up tomorrow, and you will still be the same brilliant you. Well, it might rain, but you can’t change that. Let’s just hope it’s nice and sunny when we hand the dreaded dissertation in, as I want the perfect summery aesthetic in my victory photo with a smile on my face and some bags under my eyes as war paint.

Happy reading and drinking – but please give yourself a break!

Hev xo